They say only boring people are bored. If that is the case, then i’m more boring than Nigel Melville, chartered accountant and part-time Eddie Stobart Spotter.
Of course, that’s nonsense. Boredom stems from an active mind, wanting constant input, like Johnny 5 from Short Circuit, albeit with slightly better stair climbing abilities.
There are a number of things i suggest when someone tells me they’re bored.
1. Build a sofa cushion fort. (no-one ever does this when i suggest it, excuses include ‘i dont have a sofa’ and ‘im afraid all that moving of cushions will wake the kids up’. I call these people cushion cowards)
2. Eat & drink everything that you have one of. Because there’s always one sausage left in the freezer, or a single packet of crisps, or a single three litre bottle of gin lying about. Actually, you shouldn’t really own more than three litres of gin. Unless you really like gin.
3. Write a blog. But be very careful not to write a blog about boredom, because you’ll get bored halfway thru writing a list and will just end up finishing abruptly after writing the name of a flightless bird in capital letters because that’s the only thing you can think to write because you have become bored of typing.