So, yeah, the new Transformers movie arrives at our cinemas on Saturday (two weeks later than America because apparently football occurred). So, as some kind of funky build up, I have four special Fudge’s Movie Nights planned.
…and I’m wearing my Spider-Man onesie. I have my reasons.
So, without further ado, let’s start with the best (no arguments, or I’ll bite you) and first Transformers movie, namely TRANSFORMERS – THE MOVIE.
I have Gem in the room too, although she’s trying her best to fall asleep and not ask any questions.
The Transformers have a big fight, Optimus Prime dies, then other stuff happens and then they fight a big planet sized robot called Unicron which has Orson Welles’ voice. Seriously, if you don’t know this film, we can’t be lovers or friends.
WHY IT IS GOOD!
Optimus Prime dies! Megatron gets turned into Galvatron via the medium of purple wireframe! All your favourite toys from 1984 get killed (except fucking Bumblebee)! The child isn’t annoying! There is swearing! Dinobots! DARE! OTHER REASONS! CAPS LOCK!
WHY IT IS BAD!
Nothing. None of this is bad. Not even the many animation errors, the missing dinobot, being caught crying when Optimus dies, nothing.
CHANCE OF FALLING ASLEEP!
Me – 0/10
Gem 9.975/10 (0.025 chance of her being murdered for asking too many silly questions)
INTEREST FROM TWITTER!
I’m not telling twitter. They’ll either get too excited or make fun of me.
RATING ON THE FUDGECRUMPET SCALE OF AWESOMENESS