Hello. I had sex nine months and a week ago.
Then this happened.
This is Darcey Alanna and she is a baby. She showed up at 20:21 on Friday night, but fortunately there was nothing on telly.
So, yeah, I just thought I’d introduce you to the newest member of the family, and to this blog, as she already has a couple of reviews to do over the next week or so. I imagine she’ll get me to do the typing.
Oh, and if you’re a blindfolded man, I recommend you head across to the nearest Maternity Assessment Centre, because if you don’t know where you are it sounds like all the ladies are having the best orgasms.
That’s it. Just a quick post so you’re not all “who the flip is Darcey?” next time I write something about her.
If you want, why not fuel my 2am milk preparation routine and buy me a coffee? I’ll probably just end up spending the money on Snowpiercer on blu-ray, but at least you’ll feel like you’ve contributed. Have you seen Snowpiercer? It’s awesome. Although now I’ve mentioned it, I remembered why it’s not the best film to talk about when you’re introducing your new (tasty) baby to the world.
Hmmm… I haven’t slept well for about a week.