Archive for the ‘Boredom’ Category

The pseudoscience that lives on the internet says the human body renews itself once every seven years, so I can righteously say that on the 7th anniversary of the self-publication of my incredibly slapdash collection of blog posts and potentially funny rants, someone else wrote this shit, not me.

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So I know I’ve not mentioned it on here in a while, but if you follow me on twitter I still get almost daily packages from ‘the Chinese people’, Amazon sellers with poor grammar skills who want me to write reviews for them on the various Amazon sites in exchange for free or heavily discounted products.

As often as packages of random tat, I get tweets asking “How do you get all this free stuff?” and while I have mentioned how to do it before, I figured another blog post would make it look like I’m actually producing internet content rather than stagnating and sending people to old shit.

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Before I do that, I figured I’d make you exercise your scrolling fingers a bit.

Here’s a very small selection of some of the more recent random tat…

Fancy spy stuff…

A 3D Pen… (imagine trying to draw with a glue gun)

Some kind of mad tin opener…

Some sort of daft bra…

Heterosexuality enhancement devices…

A piano.

Half a dozen pairs of VR goggles…

Bibs for mucky pups…

Not a fucking clue…

Kitchen scales!

A terrifying tooth whitening kit…

Knickers!

Right, if you wanna get involved with what I find hard to tell myself isn’t some sort of scam, get yourself signed up with review.directory, leave your amazon profile details (here’s mine) and get ready for an influx of poorly google translated review requests from people with suspiciously English names.

They usually request about 300 words in your product review, and a few insist on photos or the occasional video, but you don’t need to be as much of a magicial wordsmith like what i is. Just say nice things, end it with a lie about being honest and unbiased and Bob’s your Dad’s best mate who you call your uncle even though he really isn’t. As a computer generated insurance flogging oligarch meerkat would say “Simples.”

One thing I would recommend is being a member of Amazon Prime. Yes, it is a bit of a pricey lump, but you get free next day postage in most cases, as well as getting to watch Preacher on Amazon Video.

So, yeah, that’s me being useful and helping you get free awesome stuff, so why not buy me a coffee to show your appreciation.

See you later then.

Hello boys and girls.

I have about an hour of sitting on my arse as we commute between jobs, so figured a bit of random internet content creation would stop me getting frustrated by the Radio Leeds phone-in show that is being piped into my ears.

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On an unrelated note, I updated my phone and it now has a spell-checker. It doesn’t think arse is a word. (more…)

Hello!

Let’s write some words based upon 3-word topic suggestions by the people of twitter!

Let’s not get stroppy when some of the people can’t count to three!

Furious Bloggery!

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Unless you’ve been hiding in a cupboard with a bucket on your head for the past few months, you’ll probably be aware of the Batman Vs Superman movie existing.
I’m not going to pass judgement on the movie as I’m waiting for the blu-ray so I can watch it in my pants.

In the movie Batman and Superman have a big ol’ fight for some reason and loads of shenanigans occur and stuff falls over.

The thing is, as a parent you’re supposed to teach your kids how to resolve their differences without resulting to fisticuffs.

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Here is a list of things I have thought about while battling the mixed feelings of meat sweats and excessive sugar consumption this Christmas. Hooray!

1. THE SNOWMAN AND THE SNOWDOG IS THE SAME MOVIE AS JOHN WICK.

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"We're woah-king in the air..."

Some bloke’s dog dies, he goes off and causes a fuss, gets a new dog. Sure, some of the stuff in the middle is a bit different, but there you go.

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