Posts Tagged ‘christmas’

Right then, it’s ChristmaaaAaAas and despite weeks of blog inactivity I’m probably still expected to write a listicle or hilarious festive rant, maybe a parody song of a Christmas carol or a poorly photoshopped Santa hat on a selfie I took in September.


Sainsbury’s are being all festive this year and have released stupid flavoured tea because stupid people like me will go out and buy them for the novelty value like stupid bloody idiots.


Naturally, even though I am stupid enough to buy such stupid nonsense, I also know a good blog post when I see one. So, here is my review of this glorious shit.


Tooth-Ow-sand 18.

Posted: Jan 2, 2018 in Fudgecrumpet
Tags: , , ,

Hi there.

So, it’s 2018, the Christmas period is nearly over (because it doesn’t end until after the 9th, my birthday, obviously) and whatever turkey leftovers that remain are now unfit for human consumption except for dares.

“How was your Christmas?” becomes the new greeting for everyone who has nothing interesting to say. The weather is either depressingly moist or inconveniently icy, it’s all a pile of arse.

Yeah, I’m grumpy. I have toothache.


For absolutely no reason I’ve been looking at ridiculous rich girl shop website Tiffany & Co.

I thought I would share some of the wonderfully expensive shit that you didn’t know you didn’t need.


Hello all, today I am delving into my mancave in an attempt to have an organised personal space rather than a dangerously balanced pile of shit.

To keep myself from going bonkers, I’m going to share some of the wonderfully random crap I somehow seem to have possession of. 

Wish me luck…


It’s that time of year again, when people inexplicably send a piece of card with a festive photo, and inside that card they write their name and it’s all supposed to mean something. 

You can see I’m not a fan of Christmas Cards in general. I think the main reason would be that beyond perhaps a hastily scrawled message, they mean nothing and just get put on a shelf until the 29th December which is the first recycle bin day after all the madness ends.

Well, I’ve found something better than all that, and by better I mean made of chocolate and with my face on it.

Welcome to the world of Morse Toad personalised chocolate cards…


It’s been a few weeks since Christmonth was declared in our house, and Gem has been insisting on watching any movie with Christmas in it’s title.
It turns out that crap Christmas movies are the most depressing movies ever, at least up until the final 10 minutes when everything sorts itself out.
Anyway, I made this for you to use next time you get forced to watch a terrible Christmas movie starring whatsisname from that 90s movie. Have fun!