Posts Tagged ‘free’

So I know I’ve not mentioned it on here in a while, but if you follow me on twitter I still get almost daily packages from ‘the Chinese people’, Amazon sellers with poor grammar skills who want me to write reviews for them on the various Amazon sites in exchange for free or heavily discounted products.

As often as packages of random tat, I get tweets asking “How do you get all this free stuff?” and while I have mentioned how to do it before, I figured another blog post would make it look like I’m actually producing internet content rather than stagnating and sending people to old shit.

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Before I do that, I figured I’d make you exercise your scrolling fingers a bit.

Here’s a very small selection of some of the more recent random tat…

Fancy spy stuff…

A 3D Pen… (imagine trying to draw with a glue gun)

Some kind of mad tin opener…

Some sort of daft bra…

Heterosexuality enhancement devices…

A piano.

Half a dozen pairs of VR goggles…

Bibs for mucky pups…

Not a fucking clue…

Kitchen scales!

A terrifying tooth whitening kit…

Knickers!

Right, if you wanna get involved with what I find hard to tell myself isn’t some sort of scam, get yourself signed up with review.directory, leave your amazon profile details (here’s mine) and get ready for an influx of poorly google translated review requests from people with suspiciously English names.

They usually request about 300 words in your product review, and a few insist on photos or the occasional video, but you don’t need to be as much of a magicial wordsmith like what i is. Just say nice things, end it with a lie about being honest and unbiased and Bob’s your Dad’s best mate who you call your uncle even though he really isn’t. As a computer generated insurance flogging oligarch meerkat would say “Simples.”

One thing I would recommend is being a member of Amazon Prime. Yes, it is a bit of a pricey lump, but you get free next day postage in most cases, as well as getting to watch Preacher on Amazon Video.

So, yeah, that’s me being useful and helping you get free awesome stuff, so why not buy me a coffee to show your appreciation.

See you later then.

There’s a brand new movie of Roald Dahl’s The BFG out, and I’ve been asked to review the new movie tie-in edition of the book, packed with bonus activities and such.

Invited Jess to help me review, because I thought she could do with a break from her busy schedule of doing whatever it is 11 year-olds do, watching Miranda Sings on YouTube or not tidying up.

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Those lovely people over at Nutri-Plan have said I can run a giveaway for some of their fancy Tea-Tox detox teabags. Yay!
Now, normally I’d have a bit of fun and make you do some colouring in or whatever but 1. My last competition got 4 entries and the winner was in a foreign country and didn’t want the prize and 2. I’m really bloody tired.

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Win 2 weeks worth of this stuff!

So, I’m experimenting with that there Rafflecopter thing, with all it’s boxes to fill in and that. Please let me know if you like this sort of thing, because I honestly think it makes me into a bit of a whore.

The prize? A fortnight’s worth of Tea-Tox teabags!
The people who want to give you this prize? Those lovely people at Nutriplan!

CLICK HERE TO ENTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’d do the fancy embedding thing but WordPress is either being deliberately faffy with HTML or I’m rubbish. I’m rubbish.

Good luck!

Hi there, it’s me.

So, I need to make some money from this here blog. I mean, I could spend all day writing crap, but if I’m not raking in at least a minuscule amount of pennies from this, one of these days Gem is just gonna say “Stop being a bloody idiot and go and sell your Combiner Wars Leader Class Ultra Magnus on eBay so we can buy milk or woman products.”

Now, when that does happen I wanna be ready to say “No. He looks good on my shelf, next to Scrounge riding Grimlock. Shush. I have some monies here from a blog thing I did.”

Audible1

This is that thing. It’s kind of a mutually beneficial thing too, as you get something awesome for free. It’s one of those annoying Audible free trials. (more…)

Hi there. Let me just… oh, you just finish that first… done?

Right then, how about you-

oh. OK. Hey! Hey! Stop what you’re doing!

FFS, sit there, shut up, put your phone down. Good.

I know you’re busy, doing eight things at once, tweeting, facebooking, organising your Pokemon collection catalogue, pointing out that I’m only listing four things when I said eight. Well, I’m gonna save you some time, stop you being busy, and making that little purple vein on your head stop thumping like that time on Ren and Stimpy that I didn’t really watch because I didn’t really like Ren and Stimpy.

bullet

I’ve got here a new app called Bullet News. It lives on your phone, just like Candy Crush or that app you use to make fart noises when your missus sits down, and it gives you up to date news in a compressed super-futuristic fancy fashion (in a short list with dots on it) from all sorts of different places. (more…)